What Goes in The MUndane Mind Of Toki

alas syete na ng umagae ilang minuto nlang dadaan na ang bus… ano nanaman kaya gagawin ko sa araw na itech… hmmm.. will i be productive o aabutan na naman ako ng katam?… i feel inefficient kung wala ako nagagawa pero pag nasa opisina kana parang gusto mo wala ka ng ginagawa… paano yung iba wala naman ginagawa… yung iba sau binibigay ang ginagawa… sa aming munting kubol na napupuno ng 3 tao… palagi kami may ginagawa… samantalang ang iba… patulog tulog lang sa kanilang luklukan… sinuswelduhan din naman… mas malaki pa nga.. lang hiya kapal ng mukha… hay naku cencya na nilabas ko lang sama ng loob ko na hindi naman masyado kasi carry ko pa rin.. churvaness… whatever yaya your such a looser ika nga ni angelina… haynaku.. anu b to… inuubos ko pa oras ko sa paglalathala ng laman ng utak kong upos… cge na dyan na bus.. naiihi pa yata ako…

wakali… CITY AGRI… CHAMPIONS of the first WACKY BOAT RACE…

hahahaha…  with CITY AGRI engineering section prowess(im part of that)… with CITY AGRI planning section capacities(im also part of that)… with the CITY AGRI Fisheries section facilities(still part of that)… with my innate CRAZINESS AND WACKYNESS(im all that)… what else would you expect… AGRI DUCKLINGS hahahaha

this happened to me December 25, 2007. I woke up 7:00am that day, turned the computer on and edited some documents for about an hour when I had the sudden urge to clean the house. I stood up and turned the computer off. i opted to clean the computer area first, since it was the area closest to my bed. I started removing he mouse, keyboards and other connections to my computer when all of a sudden I felt a burst of electricity surge through my body. I fought with the current for about 10 seconds or so i was not able to really do anything because whenever i tried releasing the grip on my left hand, which was the hand holding the wires, my right hand was the one responding, and when i tried the right hand my left hand just shaked frivolously. I tried to pry the wired with my foot but alas my knee was locked underneath the table and would not even budge. Tried as i might I could not get out of that fix, but suddenly something went "kapffff"  and the electric current was suddenly gone, I let go of the wire with a loud gasp and fell back to my bed. I slumped there for a few seconds or so before inspecting what just happened. It turned out the wires from the outlet to the AVR was nibbled by some pesky rat thus exposing the inner cables I was barefoot and grabbed the exposed part thus the electric shock. What really caught me confused was when I tried running my computer, it would not turn on,. I double checked everything and found out that the fuse in the AVR was the one that blewout. I dont know how that happened but if ever it was a backward charge that blew it up then the AVR ould be rendered useless but after replacing the fuse it ran as if brand new. I was saved that morning from death by electrocution. this would be another shot in life. Maybe i had that experience to wake me up from this slump that i have been in. For about 6 years now i have told myself and other people that i would die before i turn 30, only if god still has something for me to do will i live further on. December 25, 2007 a day of all days, when we celebrate the birth of jesus christ was the date when that happened, i am turning 30 this february 13, 2007, is that a wakeup call, is someone telling me that if i were to die before i turn 30 then i would be dead now, or if some other  entity placed that way of thinking in my head then someone else is trying to correct it, that there are some entities out there who are guarding us and showing us the way and in times have really wacky ways to tell us to wake up, what ever the reason is out there, even if it was really some fluke accident waiting to happen, i still could have been dead yet im not, and im turning 30, whihc means i still have a job to do, i still have something important to finish, but i will still die when i turn 30, die inside and get reborn, time to wake up and face my fate, time to build and be a better person. If not now.. when… i choose now. its time to make amends, time to fix what is broken, time to light up what was once dark. Its time boys and girls. Its time for the toki to shine.

expect what you wish but its not always what you get… no matter how pure no matter how true… life isnt always fair in the end… but no matter how life hits you… no matter what trials come your way… what matters is how you take it… what you do after it hits… may it be success… may it be failure… will you move on… or will you succumb to the moment… will you live in pain or glory… relishing that certain moment… or will you move on to venture forth… life has struck me with a lot of misgivings and triumphs… but i have long been stucked in a pain not worth staking… now i see i have to venture forth… pick up the pieces of my shattered existence… once again glow though how faint… but glow i must… for the time has come to once again shine… shine you must… the year is young… the year is new… pains all have passed and withered all through… strive and move forth… look back as you please… but always remember to plant your foot forward not reversed as we have done… a new time has dawned… lets rejoice and start once again… im headed for law… five years to expend… time to expunge the shadows of hate… time to relive what once i have tasted… this goes for ye all… so stuck in moments tang or bliss… win or loose on must venture forth… to grow and improve… not only for the glory of god… or whom ever diety you serve… but for the upliftment of your self… you owe yer soul as much… take heed… happy new year….

its christmas time and time for a carol time to drink a bottle full of beer christmas na.. what have you guys done? whom have you shared it with? last friday i got electrocuted laying out the electrical wiring in our new house, with presence of mind i was able to release quickly… earlier today i got electrocuted once again fixing my couzins pc when i grbbed the mice nibbled power chords. if the fuse in the avr didnt go "whapak!" i wouldve fried… what do these instances mean? am i being really reckless in safety? lets look at it this way… i would believe that someone want to shock me into doing what i have to do… someone is saying "get off yer ass and do what fate has supposed ye do!"… or like waking me up with a jolt "ive juiced you up you ninny its time for ye to shine!"… do we all hafta wait to be sizzled or electrified for us to do what we ought to do?… if we have time… lets spend christmas in reflection… and weigh our lives… have we done what we are supposed to do?… are we ready to welcome our lord?… we got seven more days to fully prepare for a new year… the essence of christmas is the birth of out lord who will lead the way for us in a new year… but are we prepared?… we still have seven days… and time is ticking… have a merry christmas… and a happy new year… may you shine in all ye do… when yer light jitters.. when yer glow starts to fade… just call on me im willing to share my batteries with ye… when all else fails theres always god to lean on…. take care people… god bless and protect ye always… -tokibird 9:38pm 12/25/07

its really hard to force yourself to forget

someone who you learned not to…

someone who shares your view and opinions

someone who can voice out their mind

someone who can catch up to your way of thinking and at times overtake you and stump you…

its these days you just wish you can turn back time and halt yourself from getting to know that person…

Temptations will come your way

drugs, alcohol,opportunities of misbehaving

you know what is right and wrong

but i have confidence in your judgement

dont be afraid of failure

be more affraid of not trying

take chances and riks-

not foolhardy actions but actions which could result in failure

yet promise sucess and great rewards

always remember that no matter how bad something may seem

it will not be that bad tomorrow.

one day
i was strolling down the street
minding my own business
when suddenly
there you were standing at the corner
looking left and right just about to cross
i dont get it
my world came spinning round me
seems like heaven is coming into town
the next thing i know
you were gone
i couldnt find you anywhere
i ran to the spot you were just standing on
and started to think

whetever happened
whatever caught me by surprise
i couldnt get things going in my head
this all started a few minutes ago
struck by something i cant comprehend

the nexy day
i was jogging down the street
whistling a crazy tune
when suddenly
it all came back to me
this feeling wondrous i couldnt even explain
my spider sense tingling
somethings oh so wrong in me
so i started to think

whetever happened
whatever caught me by surprise
i couldnt get things going in my head
this all started a few minutes ago
struck by something i cant comprehend

two days after
i was hiking up the hill
thinking of nothing
when it all happened all over again
i saw u standing just above the hilltop
holding some flowers i dont know where from
all guts i mustered i dont know why
i had to meet you dont ask im shy
so here i am

"hi saw you just the other day
been thinking about you a lot though
i dont know why or how but i just had to meet you
just had to know your name,umm to ask you out for some cofee or so,
so…"

whetever happened
whatever caught me by surprise
i couldnt get things going in my head
this all started a few minutes ago
struck by something i cant comprehend

its all about a rose….

i held your hand next to my heart

i hope and pray we’ll never part

id like to hold you till the morning sun does shine

to feel your heart right next to mine

but im lost for words to say what i feel

ive lost my courage to show what is real

lost my mind thinking of you

lost my breath now that im with you

but i cant ever explain

why i feel this way

as i looked at you so near yet so far

i cant imagine this way we are

so close together

but apart as ever

for in my dreams alone i share

this feeling trully meant for a pair

that im lost for words to say what i feel

that ive lost my courage to show what is real

ive lost my mind thinking of you

ive lost my breath just dreaming of you

oh i cant explain why i feel this way

one day as i tried to stay away

fearful of rejection that i might take on today

i gathered all i can muster

to walk up to you and stutter

the words so dear so i wish to say

these three words i long i pray

would u be mine to hold and care for

u said silly boy theres nothing i long for

but im lost for words to say what i feel

nd ive lost my courage to show what is real

lost my mind thinking of you

lost my breath now that im with you

coz boy i cant explain why i feel this way